For my first ‘discussion’, I wanted to talk about something exciting, something we could all chat about, something to … well, discuss. I couldn’t decide what that was going to be, until one evening a few nights ago, the phone rang. It was a telemarketer. You know, I’m sure you’ve heard of them. They’re the ones who dial your number, insert a video camera into the telephone line, and peek through to be sure you’re just about to put a bite of dinner into your mouth before allowing you time to pick up.

They’re the ones who play on your sympathies, telling you how the children ‘need’ you, the police man’s ball can’t do without you, how the world will come to an end if you don’t set down that bite of roast beef, mashed potatoes, and fresh veggies that you’ve worked damn hard to enjoy and give them all the money in your pocket. It’s only a dollar a day, they’ll tell you. The same price of a coffee, or change you have just sitting around on your dresser. Are you sure you can’t just give a one time only donation? How about $20?
What they neglect to mention is that they also get a percentage of that dollar. Them, the people who manage them, the company who owns them, and the government who has its hand in their (and your) back pocket. Like having your own ass scratcher, only it doesn’t ease the pain.

So folks, what is your take on this? Do you think we have a right to ban these worms from infiltrating our homes? Should there be a set rule not to call at meal times? Like the waitress who comes to ask how your meal is, but always seems to catch you with your mouth full – so you can’t possibly complain before she runs off and disappears into the abyss, forcing you to eat the burnt bacon or raw eggs anyway.

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